take good care of your thread...we are connected!

“Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.” ― Chief Seattle

Lately,

I've wanted to live like a hermit recluse,

stranded on my own little island,

listening to the sound of waves ebbing,

crashing,

sitting there,

isolated,

my own little mind games keeping me entertained.

I wonder how long...

how long I'd really be content living this way,

sleeping in my little dark cave,

curled up

keeping myself company--I think I'd be pretty damn entertaining---i'm funny even if off color family does not agree----that is until the philosophical games causes a bit of loneliness to settle over the isolation.

It is not my thread to weave,

but

a loop in a long continuum

of life

that flows back to the beginning

somewhere back in time

at a place a part of us has all been to before

and

that thing through and around it, around all the little pieces,

all the while

 connecting energy flows

fusing us together in a thread that weaves a web throughout time,

and space.

Threads connected together,

twisted around,

intermingled and touching

for that is how

life ought to be lived,

connected

moving,

flowing,

jumping even at times

in places of importance.

connected

what happens to you

happens to me

nope...

island life might sound nice,

but

that is not how it works..

for we

all us tiny specks

us tiny little "whos"

living on earth in :whoville:

IMPACT

EACH OTHER...

pull out a thread

my world becomes loose

grab too much of it

strands break from the inequality....

connected

that is what we are

even on days

we had rather be living on our isolated island.

fellow humans

I'll take care of my little piece of the web...

I hope you do too...

happy Wednesday

and

hugs



cracked.....

“Maybe its like you said before, all of us being cracked open. Like each of us starts out as a watertight vessel. And then things happen - these people leave us, or don’t love us, or don’t get us, or we don’t get them, and we lose and fail and hurt one another. And the vessel starts to crack in places. And I mean, yeah once the vessel cracks open, the end becomes inevitable. Once it starts to rain inside the Osprey, it will never be remodeled. But there is all this time between when the cracks start to open up and when we finally fall apart. And its only that time that we see one another, because we see out of ourselves through our cracks and into others through theirs. When did we see each other face to face? Not until you saw into my cracks and I saw into yours. Before that we were just looking at ideas of each other, like looking at your window shade, but never seeing inside. But once the vessel cracks, the light can get in. The light can get out.”― John Green, Paper Towns

Cracked...

feeling all split open

exposed

vulnerable.

I don't know why...

or perhaps...

don't want to admit why...not out loud for the world to hear

even though it is easy to see

I'm

Cracked.

For years I was insulated,

covered by extra layers,

protective cushioning

that kept my heart from breaking open,

and

suddenly

one day

in a split second

I felt lonely

and

started to

shed the protective coats,

started to shed

that stuff that kept me at bay

and

when I did,

it happened...

there was light,

I felt...really felt..

and

a tiny prick

in my walled up walls,

things began to crumble

piece by piece

and

I

broke open

exposing

 me

for who I really was--sexy hot and all--

no further need to be perfect

or smarter or richer..

Me...

cracked me...

that was enough, is enough, will be enough.

Cracked,

splattered,

split wide open

guts all exposed...

I glanced out

light flowed in

our eyes met...

cracked up folks

staring into each others "realness"

 seeing

feeling

knowing

for the first time.

Cracked---just enough---to finally live.

happy tuesday

hugs



Faith....a rambling unsuccessful attempt to understand it.

 " Look. I know what you believe. It is in my soul. But I constantly tell other people: you should be convinced of the authenticity of what you have, but you also must be humble enough to say that we don't know everything. And since we don't know everything, you must accept that another person may believe something else."

Mitch Albom

I continue to search for an answer to something I cannot fathom. 

Faith..

my old Sunday School Definition always flashes through my mind...

Faith is the substance of things hoped for...the evidence of things not seen.....Hebrews 11:1.

I don't know where it comes from...

who gave it to me...

why it haunts me like a ghost that mocks me...

I some days wish it would go away,

but it

faith that is...

seems to be embedded in the matrix of the make-up of my bones...

well

these old bones feel

like

they'd like to dry up...

I want to scream..

Faith..

"it doesn't work"

but

as quickly as the thought enters my mind...

I know that is the lie I tell myself...

something....

something deep within myself

pinches me

and

says..

"what are you thinking"

I stare at the picture and

what comes to mind is:

"faith...all it has got me is a tear in the heart...much like the leaf above"

that thing..

that haunting ghost inside my matrix

yells...

"don't lie....faith has helped you through the hard time...has saved you from yourself on numerous occasions"...

and I know this to be true...

it has always been the legs underneath me,

the thing I go to when I don't have anything else

and

yes

the ghost is right

it has saved me..

more times

than

anyone will know...

sometimes

during the dark night of the soul...

it wraps me,

like a mother wraps and cuddles her beloved child,

it enfolds me...

like a protective womb,

cradles and rocks

brings me back to life as the dark veil tries to pull me down...

I try to uncover the Mystery of it all...

want

to know and understand how it works...

what to know the chemical make-up of

it's intricate ability to pull me forward...

wish it was in a bottle,

or part of a plug that could be plugged in at a whims notice....

Faith...

it pulls me forward,

helps me rise on a cold rainy day,

it enfolds me

even on days

when

I say

"faith...forget it"

it still shows up

faithfully

Hope and Grace

they mix with Her...

and

together...

no matter what the

day holds...

i know

somewhere

deep inside of me,

the three work together to

cover the nicks created by others

and

give me the courage to continue to unfold..

regardless of what others

tell me...

You see

Faith..

because of it..

I rise..

I rise from the depths of despair,

from the dark night of the soul,

from the Joy found in the morning...

I rise..

and

take another step

where

hope infuses grace

It pushes me forward,

floats me up

into the Mystery....

I dont' understand it..

don't quite know how to articulate it...

say I don't want it..

but

IT is a lie..

Faith....

as

George Michael

in his sexy hotness

sings..

faith...I got to have it....

so on this morning..

when I wrestle once again with the same old

question..

Where does it come from...

hope floats up,

wraps me with grace

and

I suddenly realize...

I don't have to have the answer,

but

just need to trust in

the substance of things I can't see

like where the wind comes from

where the waves begin

how love works....

and

to relish

the evidence of things seen...

like

the wonder of my family laughing together,

the insatiable gladness

that occurs when I see a leaf changing,

the sun rise,

the drop of rain clinging to a bare branch in glistening drops..

no...

don't understand a bit of it...

but

it

invites me forward

and

I smile once again at my own silly questioning mind

and

fall face forward into it.

May you too

have

a

day filled with faith, hope,

grace

and

Love..

Hugs and Blessings.