The World Feels Heavy.......

“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.”

unknown source

Today I went in the local gas station/food store to get

a fountain drink---nothing better than a fountain drink on a hot steamy day. 

As I was walking by,

an older gentleman in khaki shorts and t-shirt stood at the same machine.  He looked up and our eyes met.  I smiled and drifted off in my own little world for a moment.  He kept looking so I politely said, "how you doing this evening as I scooted behind him to get to the diet pepsi."  Next thing I knew...

he was just talking and looking at me.  I had missed part of it so I said, "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

He proceeded to explain that he

had been Cancer free for several years.  It had been throat cancer.  I thought hum..."why is this stranger telling me this?" and then I noticed the weariness in his shoulders and the heaviness in his voice. 

I suddenly felt guilty for a moment thinking about why a stranger was telling me this and then I realized

it was my gift to him to listen and be present.

I looked at him.  He didn't expect much--just an ear.

He went on to explain to me that he now had a spot on his lung and they were going to do a pet scan soon in September.  My heart felt his pain, I sensed the panic and fear in his voice and I sent a prayer out to the Universe on his behalf.  As he finished, I simply looked at him and said as I put the lid on my diet Pepsi, "Well I hope everything turns out well for you.  It sounds like you've already been through alot."

He said, "me too, I don't want to live through Cancer again."  As quickly as we met, he left me standing.

As I walked to the cashier, I heard him telling the same story to her.   I could almost tangibly feel his pain and for a split second I was present enough to

want to take and hold a bit of it for a moment.

It has been that kind of week for me.

Pain every where.

I can see it on peoples faces.

I sense it in their body.

I hear it in their voices.

Energy swirling in chaos

unsettled emotions

I watch

and

while we all have a bit of it to carry

this week

I have felt

an

overwhelming heaviness in the air.

I thought for awhile it was just

the weather

but today

with this man at the fountain drink machine,

I realized

the weight I was feeling in my own body

really wasn't mine....

but that of many others in the world

who needed some help carrying things forward into tomorrow.

We are all connected you know

whether we know each others name or not,

energy and emotion and life

wraps itself around us

and

connects us

in some weird mystical community of sorts.

together

we bear the weight of it all

shoulder each other's pain

carry the burden for while.

My own heaviness comes from thinking I've hurt someone unintentionally,

I worry about not trusting my intuition

about what others may think

about forgiving myself..

that is all my own weight to carry

my own thorn to experience

but

as i walk

I see others

shoulders almost to the ground

and

suddenly

my little burden doesn't seem so bad anymore

and

I say aloud

to the

world,

Give me a piece of that pain,

I'll hold it up for awhile

while my brother or my sister

gets stronger...

they've done it for me

time and time again...

so it only seems fair

for me to shoulder the weight for a bit.

A moment at a fountain drink machine,

an uninvited conversation

arms that wrap around a friend,

a smile

an unexpected kiss,

a touch

a handshake

a call or note....

The world can be a heavy place

but when we all

make the conscious choice to bear the weight...

it ain't so heavy.....

and

we get stronger.

so for tonight..

if your feeling blue or down or depressed or anxious,

lean out into the universe and

let somebody...

or me

bear a bit of the burden...

Tomorrow will come

and

perhaps

just perhaps it will be a lighter tomorrow.

Blessings

and

Hugs

on this Thursday Evening