CONFESSIONS OF A CHRONIC LIBRARY ABUSER....

I love books! 

It's a habit that started along time ago. Before I ever went to school, I'd sit in and look at  those old green and cream "World Book Encyclopedias". 

 Once I started absorbing information

seems I couldn't get enough and

...well I haven't stopped. 

 There is nothing like the adventure of a book.

When I was in the fifth grade, Ms. Vogel my teacher had a small library in the back of her class where kids could read books when they were finished with their work.

  I deliberately picked my seat over near the book area and I devoured every book I could.  When she wasn't looking, I'd sneak and read them while she was talking,

I'd steal them and take them to the cafeteria---dear lord

 I sound as if my nerdiness started a long time ago, don't  I.

so now that you know my love and quest for either knowledge or escape started early in life

I have to confess that I've had a big problem ever since...

When I go to the library I can't just get one book....

I get so many I need a bag or two to get them out of the library

when I was in seminary, there were times that

the entire back part of my van would be full with books flying all around..

not only is the issue that I can't just check out one,

the other issue is that

I can't seem to return them on time---ever.

So now the true confession begins....

a confession so unbecoming someone who as 'sister rachel' says, "is supposed to be a minister'....

but it's kind of funny and perhaps someone

out there has a habit that they are just as addicted to as i am to my books.....

Just a few months ago---

back in June of last year,

I checked out a bunch of books for vacation....

maybe about twenty or so.

Seems they were due back sometime during the time I was at the beach,

and I've never been one to

renew on line or call and renew or even remember that they are due...

during this time the library decided to up

their overdue fees---a hidden fact

that i had no knowledge of...

My first overdue notice came...

and a week later,

I loaded up the books,

drove by after the library closed,

went through the drive through so sneakingly

and dropped all the books

in the after hours drop...

that's good right,

I checked them out,

read them

and took them back

like a good library borrower--

okay they were a bit late...

Few weeks later,

they started coming,

envelopes filled with

florescent pink slips saying that I should contact the library because

of my excessive

overdue fees..

They came monthly

and every month,

I'd see the pink in the

box,

come inside,

take out the "bill" for over fifty dollars and

I'd hide it in the current book

I would be reading to keep my place--they did make a really nice bookmark! 

(mainly because my husband can get a bit agitated about my library fines--there have been a few

but none as excessive as the pink slip fines)

so i hid them.....

I mean after all,

I took the books back, that's not stealing is it?

why should I pay a fine just because I was late.

so I decided that I just wouldn't check stuff out anymore...

I borrowed book,

I downloaded them on my ipod,

I read books I bought years ago and placed on the shelf...

but oh no,

I never stepped foot into the library...

Around Christmas time, i went to visit my parents in Western Kentucky,

seems the mail still runs when I'm away...

This time when it came it was not

the traditional pink book mark kind of mail,

but a notice that the public library had turned over my overdue fines

to a local collection agency...

wow--not only did they waste their paper,

but now,

big trouble,

not just an overdue notice,

not just a pink slip,

but acollection agency slip

placed among the other stuff in the mail on a day when I was out of town....Who has ever been sent to a collection agency for library fines?????

Well guess who said he had something to show me when I arrived home...

Fifty dollars later,

I went back to the public library and

held my breath when I

checked out the book--hoping that buzzers and alarms would not sound.

Whew, I made it..

Today i went to get a book I'd placed on hold,

and went to the counter like a good library patron and

asked the librarian who did not smile if she'd renew my books at home.

She looked at me

over the top of her glasses and said,

your overdue limit now exceeds what you can have to check out books...

I held my breath....

oh no, it had caught up to me...I asked how much I owed while holding my breath,

you now owe seven dollars,

would you like to pay now...

visions of pink slips flashed through my mind,

heart palpitations  started and I held my breath,

so like a good library patron, a breathed a sigh of relief,

I took out my money and I paid what was due,

(cause I don't need another pink slip coming my way--cause my husband might get the mail)

Got a good book today,

just checked out one,

so I'm growing abit i suppose,

I still love book,

love them as much as I used to,

I have a problem...

I may have to start going to some kind of meeting soon,

where I start out by saying,,

These are my confessions.....

My name is Pam and I'm a chronic library abuser, but don't tell anyone--especially my husband.