LIVE

“Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all of the lives I’m not living.”

Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close (book- Jonathan Safran Foer) The off color family went yesterday to see this incredible film that makes you think. Set in New York City, the drama unfolds by first leading us into the lives of a boy named Oskar and his mom and dad.  Thomas, Oskar's dad, is an incredible father who continually teaches Oskar to break out of his shell by creating missions around the city that force him to talk to strangers, look in unusual places and connect to the world. When Oskar loses his dad in the 911 attack, the movie then takes us on a heart wrenching journey of a young boys incredible adventure to find a piece of his father once again. On his journey, he meets hundreds of strangers, shares his story and gets a piece of theirs all the while trying to uncover a mystery about a key found in a vase inside his dead fathers closet. It is a must see but be prepared to leave thinking about the gift of life, of those you love, of all the things you don't do enough of like hold someones hand, hug your children, and act silly and laugh. It had an effect on all of us. Off Color Son wrote an incredible piece of poetry, which he shared with me. I asked if i could post it...but he was not ready for his stuff to be out there for the world, so I'll respect that one. The quote underneath the dried up greenery, has my favorite quote from the movie: "Sometimes I can hear my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I'm not living." What I do know is there are lots of missed opportunities, missed chances to dance, ungiven hugs, and times when I've held back my emotions for fear of what others might think or say or want. I work hard to live my life in the fashion I feel called, but my bones they still strain abit, get burdened down by all the "what will they think" "what if..." "why" "nobody cares" that I feed into my head to cover up my shame for sometimes being afraid to live. It is Monday, the rain falls steadily outside in the darkness of early morning. Cecil the Devil Dog from Hell is shaking--he's always scared during the rain-- he's also doped up on benedryl. Hershey dog is ringing the bell on the back door to tell me he is wanting out again. Chocolate is laying at my feet. Off color daughter is sleeping over at her cousins, Big Daddy is curled up down in the love shack and off color son is cuddled underneath his blue and white blanket eyes closed sleeping this cool morning. All is quiet for a few minutes and i breath in as i prepare to go out into the world. My goal today is to give my old bones a break, to live my life, to laugh alot, cry when necessary, touch a stranger in a way no one else will know and change the world by putting goodness back into it. I'm only one person, but one person who no longer wants to bear the weight in her bones of the life she is not living. I want to live!!!! I hope you too make that choice on this dreary Monday morning start to a work week. Happy Day and Blessings!