What in the world is better because of me?

Warren Schmidt: I know we are all pretty small in the big scheme of things, and I suppose the most you can hope for is to make some kind of difference, but what kind of difference have I made? 

What in the world is better because of me?

from the movie:  About Schmidt 2002

Last night, Big Daddy decided he would give me a break from all day/ all night football and invited me to watch a movie with him.  We perused Netflicks and finally settled upon an older movie starring Jack Nicholson who is one of my favorite actors. 

In the movie, Schmidt is an insurance man whose life suddenly changes after retirement.  The movie takes us on a journey as Jack transitions through what was into what will be...all the while watching a small relationship form between a child Nudugo who he is sponsoring in a Feed the World project.  Turns out I'd seen part of the movie at some point and before it ended...I fell asleep on the couch with Big Daddy.  I woke up right at the ending when Jack was struggling with

what his life was really about....

It ended with Jack wrestling with the questions underneath the picture:

Warren Schmidt: I know we are all pretty small in the big scheme of things, and I suppose the most you can hope for is to make some kind of difference, but what kind of difference have I made? What in the world is better because of me?

It is what we all wonder, isn't it?  

Does our life matter?

  Do we really have the ability to impact the greater world, to even change the world for one tiny person?

  Can we?

I want to believe we can...to believe that everything we do somehow in someway sends out mystical energy into the universe in ripples and ebbs throughout the world---postive electrons that impact the world in a positive fashion.   I want to believe that my smiles to strangers---make a difference in their day.  I want to believe that those people who are lost and I notice---eases their distress just for the moment.  I want to believe that my life..............that my life really matters. 

  Isn't that what we all want?  

or is this just a passion that I was born with rooted deep in the cellular structure of my DNA?

I once thought that I might change the world through avenues of ministry in the church----and I worked really hard at it for a really long time......and now I realize.....ministry is bigger than the church.....bigger than the walls and steeple and people who dress up and go there on Sunday..........Ministry.............for me anyway is now more about presence......it is looking at people in the eye...listening...really listening to the tone in their voice, the quiver, the shake of tears or seeing water pool in the corners of their eyes.   I stand back...I watch...
everywhere I see pain....hurt...struggle....but yet in the midst of the pain, I hear laughter, see joy, experience celebrations.....................Life....Life is weird............it takes you on journeys and adventures that we sometimes plan and sometimes happenstance or providence moves us down a whole new pathways where grace rises to grab us and faith pulls along toward hope...................and all the while the questions continue to flash in my mind and i wonder...

   Do we make a difference? 

Does our life really matter?

Can we impact the world?  

On this Sunday morning,

in this sacred moment of the day when i sit and reflect,

I wonder

has my life really made a difference

and

all I can say is:

I hope so...

for without the difference

life is meaningless.

Have a sacred Sunday...

and

let me know....

What in the world is better because of you?

I'd love to hear what you think.